Teenagers committing suicide, despite being taboo in Pakistani society, have tragically increased. Ironically, Pakistan has no comprehensive official data on teenage suicides, but available studies suggest that around 150–300 teenagers (under 19) may have died by suicide in Pakistan over the past year.
Many parents later ask themselves the same heartbreaking question: Were there signs I missed? As a psychologist, I have sat with parents who ask these questions. While suicide is a very complex topic, and many lives are lost to it each year, many teenagers show warning signs that parents or guardians can learn to identify.
What are the common reasons for teenage suicides?
There is rarely one single reason why a teenager might try to commit suicide, because it usually develops through a combination of factors.
These may include depression, anxiety, bullying, trauma, family conflict, difficulties in a person’s relationships, substance use, or excessive stress. While these experiences can increase the risk of it, not every teenager who happens to be facing these challenges will become suicidal.
One of the most important things to understand here is that each person has a different threshold, which means these issues might lead to other psychological issues and not necessarily suicide.
Teen suicide in Pakistan
Teen suicide is a serious concern in Pakistan as well, despite the stigma, which we will address later. But the true scale of the problem is difficult to know because the country does not have a national system for recording suicide deaths.
As a result, most of what we know comes from newspaper reports and small research studies rather than official statistics.
One review of newspaper reports over two years identified nearly 300 suicide deaths among children and teenagers. Boys and girls were affected at almost equal rates, with most cases involving older teenagers.
The most common method was poisoning, followed by hanging and firearms. Many of these deaths were linked to family conflict. These can include arguments with parents and relationship problems, and most occurred close to the teen’s home.
Research also suggests that suicidal thoughts are not uncommon among young people in Pakistan. For example, one study of medical students found that nearly 5 per cent had attempted suicide at some point, while more than one third had experienced suicidal thoughts during their lifetime.
How to identify these signs: some hints for parents
So what should a parent actually watch for? According to experts, pulling away from friends and family can be one sign. A teen who used to text friends all day and now stays alone in their room a lot. Huge changes in mood are another sign.
Additionally, sadness that does not lift, and anger that comes out of nowhere. Some teens talk about feeling like a burden. Some talk about death in a way that feels different from normal teen jokes.
Some teenagers also use what is often called “dark humour” to joke about death or suicide. Humour by itself is not necessarily a warning sign, but a coping mechanism.
However, repeated comments about wanting to die, feeling hopeless, or saying that others would be better off without them should always be taken seriously, especially if they are accompanied by other changes in behaviour.
Saying things like “I wish I were dead” or that life is not worth living should not be brushed off as just a teen tantrum.
Some other signs can include increased risk-taking, using drugs or alcohol, or self-harm like cutting. Even sudden calmness or seeming “better” after a long sad time can be a red flag.
Should I ask my teenager about having suicidal thoughts?
Parents often worry that asking about suicide will put the idea in their child’s head. However, research shows that asking a direct and calm question does not increase risk. It often opens a door and tells a teen that someone is paying attention and that someone cares.
If a parent notices these signs, the best step is to stay close and stay calm. Remove things in the home that could be used to cause harm.
Ask directly if they have thought about killing themselves, because asking does not plant the idea.
Protective factors can reduce the risk
It is also important to remember that many protective factors can reduce the risk of suicide.
Having supportive family relationships, trusted friends, access to mental health care, and even one adult who listens without judgment can make a meaningful difference.
Small conversations and early intervention often have a much greater impact than parents realise. Teen suicide builds over time through pain that often goes unseen, but early attention can change the outcome.
Parents do not need to be superhumans; they can help their children a lot by simply noticing that something is wrong, listening without judgment, and seeking help. If a teenager says they intend to harm themselves, seek emergency medical care without any sort of delay.
